A short update of the inner process that I walk day by day, looking within myself what comes up in moments and how it can play out if I am not aware of my thoughts and emotions.
Last week I had more of an insight what goes on within me, before I go into an interpretation and so, reaction towards a situation but actually, towards my own created interpretation of a situation. An aspect that I found is that I was sort of ‘speaking up’ of what I would not go into anymore, however what I saw quite fast after this and actually already while doing so, is that it was more that I had not yet stand up in it for and within myself and really decided for myself what I would accept and allow and what not. And then I go into a projection towards another or towards a situation as in a ‘speaking up’ in that moment, which is then actually creating a possibility for conflict or consequences.
I did see how I could do differently and then within voicing myself about a certain point, in a moment to come, which then is supportive for myself as well as it can be for another, but I had already build up energy that I was now releasing in this ‘speaking up’ and in this way no longer accepting and allowing something within myself, however I used the situation as a mirrow to start seeing how it was all about me in that moment.
The remarkable thing is that I realized some of it in the moment that I started to build it up in the same day earlier, where a thought was activated within me and from here an emotion arised, from where I went into an ‘expectation’ that it would play out as how I was feeling about it. And from here, very fast, I created the situation in a way where in I played out my own expectation.
Luckily the other who was involved did not go into it with me and only described what happened on their side and from here I could easily bring the point back to myself and voice myself in taking responsibility for the situation and for the emotion that I recognized as jealousy coming up, which is something to investigate further within/for myself as it has many aspects in it I may not have directly recognized as jeaulousy, however it has a destructive energy in it.
The cool part of this small situation and my interpretation playing out, is that in doing so and taking the responsibility and sharing about it while walking, it is giving a more equal standing with who I am sharing this, as it gives an insight of what I walk inside myself and then shows how we are all having similar challenges within ourselves with facing our own interpretations and emotions coming up. I find this gives for each who is involved, more space to understand oneself and each other without going into judgements.
More challenges to come, however also cool to recognize the progress within self and each other.
I can truly say that what I am now writing about is the result of walking the Desteni I process for years now, where in I actually can see a ‘mind-construct’ playing out within myself as something that I have learned to walk within the writings in the lessons and in the blogs as well (and what I am still doing). It is an effective way of getting to know myself in who I am in my mind and how my mind-being-body relationship is existing and influencing me every day and then being able to take responsibility for myself in this as in learning to give myself direction within and as this internal relationships in a way that is considering and caring the life within and without.
For who is interested check it out: Desteni I process courses
Journey to Life – Reis naar Leven:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
Ingrid’s Desteni Witness Blog
The Secret to Self-Realisation:
Proces van wereldverandering: