I saw my last blog was from 11 may so that is …… 5 months ago! I missed it and I missed ‘myself in the writing’.
In between a lot of changes have taken place and one of them is moving to another house – as also the reason for this ‘break’ within the writings. A beautiful place where I would like to stay and settle in. Now what to write about? There is much to reflect back on. Often when I travel to work in the morning there is almost a ‘whole blog’ coming up within me lol but when sitting down for it, it is different many times. I have learned that by just sitting down and starting the writing and keep on doing this, there will be enough to write about.
I will keep it simple this ‘first’ blog and reflect back on the process of changing houses. When I started the Desteni I Process 7 years ago, one year later I also changed the house and took a break from writing. I do remember that period as more stressful than this time changing, altough the house that I live in now, asks for a lot more work than the previous one. This is a proof for myself that I did become more stable inside myself through these 6 years and I am content with this. I certainly suggest to investigate what the Desteni I Process entails as this process is a guideline to develop this stability inside self.
There was one moment where I felt like I ‘lost’ it and it took me some days to stabilize again. I find it actually a ‘strange’ thing to so much get out of balance from. I am someone who is good at organizing and planning and that is then what I do. I look ahead in time and make sure that I do scedule enough time to plan the activities. It was a process that would take a few months and combined with work for a living as well, so I know here for myself that I need to make a ‘wide’ scedule, meaning taking enough time for each activity and not scedule too much after each other in one day. This is how I function best without going ‘over my top’. So I did and everything went very well.
There were 2 activities that I needed to outcourse and one of these tasks was putting in the venyl floors in the 3 rooms on the second floor. So I sceduled this as well 5 days before I would move all the stuff from the old to the new house and as much as possible after the painting. I was prepaired and all, staying over for one night in the new house, waiting for them to come somewhere in morning/afternoon that day. They confirmed with an sms to come and so everything seemed ‘on scedule’.
But they did not come! I called their helpdesk, waiting 20 min before I got someone on the line, where I heared that the upholsterer did put down the work that morning and did not come at all. But they forgat to inform me as well and sceduled a moment 3 weeks later without discussing this with me. And here I locked down and could not comprehend that the floors were not coming that day.
It was like my whole scedule went down and as if everything that I planned and organized and put into labour, did not make sense anymore because of this. Practically it meant that we (me and the ones helping me with moving the stuff) needed to put in everything into the rooms while moving, that I let it in boxes and unpacked for 2,5 weeks, that I then take it out and place as much as possible in the bathroom and move the rest from room to room while the upholsterer is busy and put it all back again. It means a day more work and some uncomfortable living for a few weeks but it’s not like ‘the whole world comes down’. It would be alright a few weeks later and I knew this. But still it swept me off my feet for a few days. I did not expect such thing to happen, actually I did arrange to do it this way; to outcourse this task so that I did not need to worry about that one thing! And it perhaps has to do with this suddenness and unexpectedness that it ‘took me over’ for a while. But let’s see within the self-forgiveness what opens up about it in the next blog.
Journey to Life – Reis naar Leven:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
Ingrid’s Desteni Witness Blog
The Secret to Self-Realisation:
Proces van wereldverandering: