Dag 663 – The cycle of abuse


Have you ever been participating in an abusive relationship? Many of us have and I would actually make the statement that almost everyone of us have in some way. Because, who for example has been ‘bullied into silence’ in their life once or more? Or maybe not ‘bullied’ in a way that would be recognized as such but for example ignored, or laughed into silence. Almost every child has been in this place in a situation that is not taken responsibility for after it had happened. From here, almost every child will do the exact same thing to another once or more later in their life, because this is how it has ‘learned’ and stored as a memory without learning how to correct this and here, the abused becomes the abuser. And so on.

Abuse can take place on a very subtile level or on a very visible level and there are many degrees in between, however the mechanism in it in the very beginning is the same. And to understand this mechanism and from here open the ability to end it, we need to get to know our own mind. Because, the mind in itself is set up as an abusive program. So let’s bring ‘abusive relationships’ into another perspective so that we do not fall into ‘oh’s and ah’s’ and emotions of ‘pity with others’ and judging it as ‘so bad and how can he or she do this and/or allow this to be done onto’ because no one is supported with that for real and it actually shows that one is reacting in separation from oneself and from the abuse that takes place on a daily base in the relationship…….with ourselves. Where we bully, ignore, laugh ourselves into silence.

What I came across related to the word abuse is the next picture:

cycle_of_abuseWhat is standing out for me is the word ‘forgotten’ in it as an essential point/sign that there did no correction take place. With every incident that happens, we have the choice what we will do about it and a decision who we are or will be/become within it. When we so called ‘forget’ what happened, we actually are suppressing what has happened and here we are not able to take responsibility for ourselves within what has happened. And if we do not take responsibility for ourselves within a situation that we actually should, it will be ‘stored’ somewhere within our physical body as a memory with emotional attachements that will remain there untill it will be activated (again) by someone or something else that we ‘react to’ in for example angryness again. Which gives a cycle.

When we do recognize the cycle of abuse within a relationship/within ourselves, this contains an opportunity for change or correction of who we are within what happens in every phase. Where we should actually not ‘forget’ what happened but where we need to forgive ourselves for what has happened. As well for the abuser as the abused. Only if we give ourselves the opportunity to forgive ourselves for who we are within a certain situation, pattern, accident etc, we will be able to eventually correct a pattern effectively within and as ourselves. If we do not forgive, first and foremost ourselves, we do not yet have seen and understood how we are involved within this certain situation, how we are part of the creation and that which we do not (yet) understand, can not (yet) be corrected by ourselves. Because the mechanism has not been seen and understood.

There are so many dimensions involved in abusive situations and relationships. This blog is more to point out a tool that one can learn to use as self-empowerment through learning to understand the core of every abusive situation and behaviour: the mind consciousness system that exists in every human being.

There is a very practical course free available online where one will be guided by and through the course material (and a personal buddy) to learn what a mind-consciousness system is, what self-forgiveness actually contains and how one can learn to apply this for oneself. To from here look out for solutions and eventually apply the self-corrections in physical reality. Which is ofcourse a process over time. Check it out here.



Proces van zelfverandering:
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY (Ook in het Nederlands!)

Zelfeducatie free:
De Kronieken van Jezus

Journey to Life – Reis naar Leven:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
Ingrid’s Desteni Witness Blog

The Secret to Self-Realisation:


Proces van wereldverandering:

Uil forgive

Dag 356 – Lead by the eggleaders (ovaria)

EierstokkenIn Dutch language, the ovaria is called ‘eggleaders’ (eileiders). It leads the egg to the uterus. Well, it does not only lead the egg to the uterus, it leads the whole life of a woman, and indirectly of men. So the eggleaders lead humanity. It lead humanity to give birth to another ‘person’ and we direct our whole life – directly or indirectly – into this purpose, or we resist this purpose which is enlarging this same purpose in general. However, it is directed by this system of reproduction, which is still a system, and we are giving birth to ‘new life’ as a system, because we have become one and equal as our mind consciousness system and we pass this through into the ‘new life’, so the new life becomes equal and one as a ‘new’ mind consciousness system, and this we call ‘new life’. mmmmmmm……….

We do not know what it is to birth life, to birth ourselves as life in/as/through the physical. Many woman have problems around the area of the ovaria, related to menstruation. Menstruation is described as many things, from ‘a problem’ to ‘something sacred’. During my study of natural medicine I wrote my whole paper about the cycle of menstruation. lol we were looking for a translation of the word ‘timeloop’ into Dutch, and the word cycle was also mentioned, which I actually see as a ‘wide or large timeloop’. So, the menstruationcycle is actually keeping us in a timeloop of fertility which repeats over and over again. mmmmmmm……..

Marilyn Monroe: The Human Design – Menstruation

Then should we not give life anymore to new children? It is not precisely like that. I would say, we first have to support ourselves to become able to give life towards/as ourselves, and within this give life on earth, before we are ready to give life to another human being through our body. Because we have to guide this new human being, we have to educate and support this new human being, to be able to become as life itself, life as being responsible, responsible for self as life, for life as self. And if we all do that – first educate ourselves and then pass on this education to the next generation, after a few generations, life on earth will change into a life-worthy existance for every one and every thing.

So, if we did already have given birth to another human being before we as ourselves were as life, then what should we do? Do we have to judge and blame ourselves for this? No, sure not. This is what we already have done for a long time, although we are not really aware of it. We start the same process; we start walking this process of taking responsibility for ourselves in/as the mind and giving birth to life in/as ourselves through the physical. We write, we apply self-forgiveness and self-corrective application, and we change in and as the physical, as only when we change in and as the physical for real, this physical existence will start changing. With or without kids, the process is exactly the same, for every one.

We have given our authority to the eggleaders and made this a point of self-interest. Listen to the butterfly, listen to the bee. The butterflies allign reproduction to and as life, as what is best for all, for all butterflies, in co-operation with the earth. The bees work together with the plants and the earth, they take care of each other in a way that they will not take and take and take to survive. They give and receive equally. They live in and as their utmost potential, and if this is no longer possible in any way, than they decide to pull back, to stop reproduction, as living less than their utmost potential what sense does this make? We call them ‘lower species’. mmmmmmm……….


We as humanity are not so smart. Self-interest does not make us very smart and is very short-sighted, it makes people blind. Blind for the potential that is existing in humanity as life, If and when we are willing to work together with and take care of everything and everyone; human, nature, earth, plants, animals, as what is best for all. Giving and taking equally. At the moment, we are not even able to take care of our own species as humanity; we do Not take care, we only take, and take and take.

Where is my authority? Oh my god, it is “lying in” my eggleaders! And I gave it away to men in/as the mind, indirectly, not directing myself but in my perception and belief, ‘lying’ all day to myself, so actually and of course,  I gave it away to my mind (consciousness system), to lead me over the edge. I gave it away to lead me over the edge so that I do not need to take self-responsibility, for who I am as have become, for what I have done, for all the consequenses I have created and/or accepted and allowed to exist, within me and without me.

Only I can stop the limitations as the edge, existing in/as the mind consciousness system, to be and become the potential existing within me, in co-operation with all living species existing in and as earth. because in this, in earth, in the flesh, we are all Equal, so if I become One with and as the flesh, in and as the physical, I become equal to all that is existing, including myself. We are all made of clay.

Are you looking for your authority as self-direction?

Start today, it’s free:

Desteni I Process Lite.

Self-forgivenesses will follow in the next blog.

Authority is That which Life Grants Each One Equally, the Authority as Life.
There is One Authority on Earth now, which Stands Above all, that Dictates, which is Death. Death is the Point where Life is Authorized or Not, and to Get Authorized as Life – you Must, before Death comes: Be the Physical Evidence as the Living Flesh, as the Living Word – that you Understand the Authority as Life, as Equal, as What is Best for All – or You Will Not Pass Death (Bernard Poolman).


Mogelijkheid tot wereldverandering met gelijke kansen voor ieder-een:
Equal Life Foundation:
Proces van zelfverandering:

www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY
Proces van relatie naar agreement:
Zelfeducatie free:
Journey to Life:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
De Desteni Boodschap – Wat doen we ermee?:
Zelfvergeving als Toegift aan jeZelf: