Dag 742 – 21. Opportunity to change direction

This blog is related to record 21: Opportunity to change direction

For context and playlist see: Dag 710 – Reflection on the years of fertility

The self-forgiveness are written as if it is happening in current time, however it are self-forgiveness on a pattern that I am reflecting back on and now taking responsibility for.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to change direction and to step into the unknown and within this, knowing that I have somehow ‘missed an opportunity’ for expansion within and as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame myself for not daring to change direction and stepping into a new area, where at the same time, I saw that it may have been too much expansion within the unknown without enough practical and grounded (self-)support.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel thorn for so many years between seeing a potential and living a potential and within this, feeling myself as ‘less than’ who I perceive in and as the mind that I can be, without really seeing, realizing and understanding the extensive process that is existing between seeing and living my potential that is not easily stepped in and walked as something that is most challenging for myself and everyone else to really walk in and as this physical reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ‘think lite’ about the challenging process of stepping into the unknown and within this, letting go of the control of my own mind-programming as ‘that what I know’ and through this ‘thinking lite/light ;-)’, diminishing myself in who I am within walking what I am physically able to in that specific moment and so walk moment by moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to diminish myself through the eyes of my own mind and within this, create a ‘matrix’ or ‘breeding ground’ for ‘feeling less than’ and ‘feeling better than’ others in/as myself within comparison.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create conflict within myself through a separation of my physical stability as ability, within my emotional dependency as inability in/as the mind and so creating this emotional/mind dependency as self-inability in/as the physical and sabotaging and stopping my physical ability as potential to give birth to a child (and to give birth to myself as life as well).

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sabotage and stop my own physical ability as potential to live, within listening to and living in and as my emotional dependency in/as the mind, instead of stopping my emotinal dependency in/as the mind and stepping into this physical doorway of opportunity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself physically and within and as self-expression from a starting-point of fear for the unknown, thinking and believing that I cannot make it, that I will fall into depression and fall apart and crash down if and when I would let go of this emotional dependency in/as the mind as the ‘one and only relationship’ that I know.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that I am right and make the right decision when and as I follow that what I know within my emotional dependency in/as the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not want to hear another advise that is saying that I am allowed to reconsider my decision that I firstly made as a safe ground to walk on, although I do realize somewhere within that moment that I skipp a part of myself to invest.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that it is a possibility to skipp a part of myself to invest and thinking and believing that I ‘do come away with this’ and that I ‘can escape’ somehow.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use a dream as a ‘consciousness sign’ as a confirmation of my decision in safe ground and to not listen to a practical, physical advise from a friend who is opening up a dimension within and as myself that I have not yet considered, simply because I experience too much fear to open it up and rather stick to consciousness as what know and so, what I believe that I can control.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only want to let go of my limited consciousness system if and when it is not or no longer at my advantage and to want to keep it when and as I think that it is or can be at my advantage and so, separating myself within this conflict of not standing absolute in equality and oneness as what is best for myself as live as a whole, this as a way to avoid the difficult and unknown parts within and as myself to walk.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to walk around the difficult parts within and as myself, thinking and believing that ‘I do not know how to do this’ but actually to avoid unpleasant experiences within and as myself (that I for example have connected to ‘not knowing how to do this’).

When and as I see myself participating in a thought of ‘I do not know how to do this’, I stop and breathe.

I realize that I am avoiding an unpleasant experience within and as myself.

I commit myself to allow myself to experience the unpleasant and within this, using the tool of self-forgiveness and breathing, to walk through and see what opens up as possible solution and I commit myself to keep pushing and walking, no matter how slow it goes, no matter how tired I feel or really physically am; this can not be an indication to not push through but even more an indication that I need to keep pushing because ‘going back’, is not an option, where in I realize that this is part of the birthing process of birthing myself as life, in and as the physical, walking through all tge layers of consciousness and taking responsibility for how I have separated myself within all these systemized dimensions.

When and as I see that I ‘think lite’ of the challenging process of stepping into the unknown as no longer following consciousness programming and letting go of a control-mechanism, from myself or another, I stop and breathe.

I realize that the theory is easy but really walking it is a different story because in many layers, there are stored unpleasant experiences as moments of an experience of ‘loosing control’ as misunderstanding of what is happening and here I need to walk backwards through these experiences one by one, to be able to forgive as understand myself in this specific experience so that from here, I enable myself to change into a way that is supportive and best for myself and/as others that are involved as well.

I commit myself to keep on supporting myself within the constant and consistent application of breathing, writing and introspection within self-forgiveness as self-understanding and to do this with perseverance, to be able to stand and keep standing within the moment, without taking control in/as the mind and then seeing what opens up, no matter if I fail or fall or apparently not am moving myself and no matter how miserable I experience myself for a while or certain timeframe –  and so, I live and ground myself in and as the word perseverance.

When and as I see myself judging a control-mechanism, from myself or another, I stop and breathe.

I realize that judging in itself is a form of control as the only way that I have learned and seen in and as the mind to try to solve things, when actually the judging in itself keeps the door closed for possible and livable solutions.

I realize that the unpleasant experiences are actually coming from an idea as judgement of how things should be.

I commit myself to start with naming and forgiving the experience that comes up that I find unpleasant, in the moment that I see myself judging a control-mechanism and to name and forgive the idea as judgement within and as myself and I commit myself to first become stable within this and from here, see what needs to be directed within the situation itself that I then can open up without ‘being upset’ and ‘feeling controled’, because then I have already directed myself and so, no longer controling myself with an idea and unpleasant experience and I commit myself to keep on practising this self-stability because,

this in itself is already a change in direction within and as myself and all these little moments of apparently loosing control, are opportunities to change direction, within and as myself.

Previous blog: 20. Searching for the life within me

Next blog: 22. looking back without considering the mind

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7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
Ingrid’s Desteni Witness Blog
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The Secret to Self-Realisation:

http://creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2013/02/day-311-secret-to-self-realisation.html

Proces van wereldverandering:
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733 – Projection – What if that what I am seeing, through thinking, is not ‘as it is’?

projection1

Projection is one of the most difficult mechanism of the mind to really see within ourselves. Through thoughts, feelings and emotions it seems like that what we see and experience is reality, while it is actually only a personal interpretation that we have build up, through memories, within our life, mostly as a control-mechanism and then continuesly used to protect ourselves for the experience of ‘loosing control’. Within this, we look through our ‘mind-eyes’ and then project this on physical reality.

Projection has also different dimensions. For myself, I have learned that I still do believe in certain moments – and certainly have believed – my own thoughts, feelings and emotions as if it is real, however I have quite early in process learned to open up my own point of view, by asking myself the question: what if that what I am seeing through thinking, is not as it is, what if the other is telling me how it is actually, so, in terms of the mind: what if I am ‘wrong’ and the other is ‘right’; no matter how much I am convinced by my own experience to be real or ‘right’ as how it is?

This question can open up ‘process’, for me it did.

Process meaning, walking from consciousness to awareness in taking responsibility for who we are in our thoughts/feelings/emotions, words and deeds and learn to self-honestly reflect and change.

Within this realization, I could approach another again and bring forward that I opened up for their view and let go of my view as ‘being right’. Where within this, I saw indeed that I really had projected my own view  – as how it is for me – on another, so I placed my own build up mind-situation on another, as if this was ‘about them’. But it was not, it was only about me.

Seeing this, is giving an opening to become self-honest. It is opening up the possibility that what I see, is not how it is. And from here it gives an opening for listening from a different starting-point; from here on I learned to listen from a starting-point of seeing what is real, of a willingness to learn and listen and integrate and expand; not to ‘proove that I am right’ but to see what is real and from here, integrate and learn to apply what is best for all.

It seems such a small insignificent step. However, it is a change in starting-point, from a ‘closed circle’ in/as the mind, where in I have locked in and encrypted myself within my own memories and experiences, to opening up, to really listen and learn.

While doing so – when I am willing to listen and learn and expand –  the personal points of view that I created in ‘default’ so to speak, will one by one come forward, within and as myself. And here I then can take responsibility for my personal interpretations and the effect and consequence of this, by forgiving myself for accepting and allowing myself to keep myself occupied within my own personal and self-created point of view.

From here it is a process for years to walk, as I have layered so many aspects within myself, where I really believe that ‘what I see and how I feel is real’ and so, I keep myself occupied in and with it. However, through time and application, it becomes easier te be self-honest and most important, this willingness to learn, to listen and see what is real, this did not go away anymore. This one moment of realization that I have walked and applied in reality as a change within/as myself, as an opening up, this I has been established as a constant and consistant self-support from where I can continuously expand.

More difficult do I find it now, when another is projecting his/her thoughts on me and through this, really manipulating a whole situation or interaction. Because as long as this circle in/as our own mind is closed without an opening for other views, it is not so easy to reach out to the beingness that is channeled within and as the mind, within and as this closed circle, to bring in some common sense and such conversation easily spirals out of control. Because, at this stage there is no real communication possible, as the mind can/will protect it’s own rightiousness and use all kind of really smart projections to keep oneself locked-in and existing, to ‘proove’ to be right and from here, it will keep every other view locked out, at distance.

This is something that I will open up for myself in next blog, within the application of self-forgiveness where in I will take responsibility for the experiences that are coming up within me, when and as projections are placed on me so to speak and on the experience of not knowing how and where to start about how the mind works, on the experience of not knowing how to make clear that what is being said, is not about me, but about what another is projecting (on me in this case) as a personal mind-interpretation.

“As you’ve already Noticed, if you’ve been with Desteni for several years: Change, in any form whatsoever – is the most difficult thing. That, Simplistically because – the Systems that Control the Human, and I mean the Human – your Thoughts, Everything is Controlled Completely. At some level one do Understand this, although some are so well Controlled that they would for instance Think ‘they are their Thoughts’, which is like fascinating that one can come to such a Conclusion.” (…)

(…) “We knew of the Problem in the Beginning when the Portal Opened – so, to Solve the Problem there was only One Solution: everyone had to be placed in an Equal Position in the Dimensions, that means – in the Afterlife. Unless they are in an Equal Position, we’ll have continuous Deception and Misrepresentation, and Image and Likeness’s that we have to Deal with – and it will take a long time to Break-through this to get to Self-Honesty where one can get to Self-Responsibility. As the Destonians know, how difficult it is to help another being on Earth – it is like, it’s Virtually Impossible. It’s like pulling hens teeth, and hens don’t have teeth – so, that’s how Difficult it is to even get One Person to Realize the Extent of the Problem that they are Existing as in their Fake Illusions, and their Images and Likenesses – through which they are Protecting the Inner Evil that Life has always been, within this World.” 

From: The Encryption of Systems (Part One)

projection


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7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
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Ingrid’s Desteni Witness Blog
Facebook:
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http://creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2013/02/day-311-secret-to-self-realisation.html

Proces van wereldverandering:
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Dag 651 – Is human nature corrupt and if it is, how can we change this?

corruptie

Let’s have a look at the very small examples of corruption that takes place on a daily base within the aspect of corruption as briberay. We know the corruption world-wide that has to do with using money to get something done that the one with the (most) money wants, without considering if this is best for all that are involved in/as life. So corruption here can be described as an action of self-interest, within the interest of one or a very few.

How is it that we ourselves use corruption in our daily life? Isn’t it so that we are all familiar with corruption from a very young age? As for example a promise of a desert if we first eat our meal, or the promise of a candy if we co-operate with a task that needs to ben done. This is actually a form of bribary with a reward in it. It is not teaching us why it is best that the meal should be finished or why it is best that the task should be done and it has also no possibility within to see for the child itself, what the responsibility is within. It learns for example that ‘I will finish my meal for a nice desert’ or ‘I will co-operate so that I can have a candy’ which is a limited reward-system actually.

Here we see that corruption entails a ‘reward’ without considering the consequenses from doing this in a ‘corrupt’ way – corrupt meaning, not considering the responsibility that needs to be learned and lived, if we do want a result that is considering life as a whole and all that is involved.

Then what is here the solution? The solution is not so easy because these small examples of corruption (with the use of rewards involved) are often related to a lack of time to teach, to make mistakes, to co-operate, to make a nice meal from certain food or to investigate why a meal is not finished and find solutions for this, because many of us has to run to make money to survive, which can also be seen as a ‘reward’ within a – more or less – corrupted system. So we are all involved into this corrupted system related to some form of reward of ‘no money no life’ and this needs to be turned around to make this world a better place for all. Not to judge or ban each and every ‘reward’ in itself, but more to learn and see what a reward-system is actually build from, so that it can be used from a starting-point of common sense and in consideration of what it entails.

A way to start with this is to start recognizing this pattern within ourselves and then not go into self-judgements, but going into a self-forgiveness of participating in a corrupt system within and as ourselves. The fact that we participate within corruption in and as ourselves (or easily being tempted to participate) may sound cruel at first, but if we really see direct and with common sense, we all have to come to the conclusion that this world is build of relationships and relationships are formed by human beings and human beings, that are you and me.

So, saying that ‘we have nothing to do with how the world exist today’ is not grounded within common sense but more based on ignorance of how each of us is responsible for how this world exist today, most of us through a passive acceptance and allowance more than an active creating. We are all participating in it through money, electricity and water for example so we are part of it and we are inter-related within this physical existance on earth. From here we can see a bit further into human nature, and if we really do this within ourselves within self-honesty (so beyond the corruption as dishonesty as how the mind functions), we will see that how the world-system exists today, is a reflection of how we exist within ourselves, each one of us, in different aspects that all together ‘create’ the outside world, through relationships.

A solution to start with is to start within the very small, within ourselves and learn to see how we are using corruption to get what we want, to reach a certain goal without consideration of the whole and what is best, but more from limitations and hiding behind excuses as ‘having no time’ but also from a point of ‘really not knowing how to do it differently’ because we didnot learn this, we did not get the support that we all needed and need.

It’s time to teach and support ourselves to create relationships that are best for all and everything that is involved, as this includes ourselves. Meaning, that if we do something from a starting-point of self-interest, it eventually is also not best for ourselves but compromising ourselves in the way we compromise others. We are part of the relationship, we cannot exclude ourselves from this. The ones with a lot of money can still do so, that is where corruption is used on a large scale. However no one will have a narrow excape in the very end, although it might seem so for a while or even for a longer time. But corruption, it is actually done from a pretty limited view and it ignores how we are all inter-related and it’s definitely not getting the most potential up and rising within this world, within each human being and within and as life in general.

Corruption is used as a way of control or as a way to seemingly get out of the control; without seeing, realizing and understanding that within using the same ‘control-mechanism’ as corruption is that we want to get away from, we still limit and control ourselves within and as this very control-mechanim that we use and apply.

Only if something is actually strong and wise, control is used as a mechanism to suppress the strength and wisdom within, to suppress the expression of life actually. So realizing this, we can also start realizing that there must be something more within ourselves, within each one of us, if control is used on such a large scale.

There is  a very effective and structured way to open up these control-mechanisms first within ourselves, to understand and forgive ourselves within and from here, make room for correction, within ourselves/within the relationship with ourselves, from here within the relationship with those around us and so eventually spreading out, to the relationships that the world-system is build of.

It is not the whole picture ofcourse because the world-money system is very intriged and build as a closed system, so there are changes needed on a very large scale. However, one can start within self, simply because someone has to start and only each one of us can make this decision for oneself to do so.

Investigate this free online-course to stand up for /within oneself, within the recognizing of the potential that each human being (and life as a whole) can be. Which, if we will be able to (together) build a world from this utmost potential as what is best for All as Life, is the greatest Reward that one can imagine.

“There is Help, there is Support – if you Dare to Investigate. So, start with DIP LITE – it is Free, with a buddy to Help you to Break through some of the Points. But it will require Extensive Study. Whenever somebody claims they are Enlightened, know one thing: Enlightenment was part of the Script, Enlightenment isn’t Real. You cannot become Enlightened, from the perspective of some form of Consciousness – because, that will Separate you from your Responsibility as Life and you will Never be Self-Honest about what you really do.”

“Do Investigate, Test Self-Forgiveness, get to Understand Self-Honesty. Do Not Listen to your Thoughts, and your Feelings and your Emotions – they are your Guards of your Jail Cell. You are just in a Prison, ‘Pry Son’ – you are the Son of your own Design, you are the Creator, you are Playing God. But all of this Playing God, is all an Illusion of Self-Interest – where you Place your Interest before Life. That is Unacceptable.”

See also: Part 4Part 3Part 2Part 1
sleutelgat encryption
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Proces van zelfverandering:
http://desteniiprocess.com/courses
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY (Ook in het Nederlands!)

Zelfeducatie free:
https://eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.org
De Kronieken van Jezus

Journey to Life – Reis naar Leven:
https://nl.gravatar.com/ingridschaefer1
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
Ingrid’s Desteni Witness Blog
Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
https://www.facebook.com/groups/326696524041028/

The Secret to Self-Realisation:

http://creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2013/02/day-311-secret-to-self-realisation.html

Proces van wereldverandering:
http://bigpolitiek.blogspot.nl/
http://livingincome.me/wiki/The_Living_Income_Guaranteed_Proposal
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Uil forgive