Dag 741 – Can I learn to empathize?

Certain people are ‘by nature’ more empathic than others. It can be so because of how one has grown up; it can be pre-programmed. This doesn’t automatically mean that one is doing ‘what is best for all’ as then again, one can be for example ‘over-empathizing’ and forget to take care of oneself.

However, what if you notice that you do not really be emphatic by nature and so, noticing that this has consequences for others and for self as well? What if you ‘don’t feel’ what it means to be empathic, if you do not ‘feel’ what others may need for example and so, easily walk over others without even noticing?

I can start with an example of myself in this. I can say that I am empathic by nature, I also am a female, who often have learned to develop some empathic qualities. However I have also noticed an aspect within myself where I easily and automatically, could let someone ‘drop down’ or ‘fall down’, within the thought/believe that some can or should take care of that aspect within themselves, without looking further within their nature for example and seeing if they may need some support in this.

Within this, I did not ‘feel’ that I ‘wanted to help’, coming from a starting-point that we each should take care of ‘our own business’, as how I have developped this within myself. What I did feel in this, is quilt, for not being helpful enough, for not giving enough, although no one really had said such things to me. It was more existing on a subtile level where I somehow saw that I could do more but I did not (want to) do this and did also not know how to take this on. With the consequence that I also found it more difficult to receive ‘help’ from others as I found that I did not deserve this (because I was not giving it eather).

So this gave a subtile conflict within myself on the background that was interfering within my social interaction and communication in many ways.

I have in real time walked a path to correct this; first with animals, where I for years, have taken care of quinea pigs and rabbits that became older and needed a lot of support where I had ‘to give it my all’ to get them through as long as possible. I also have walked a relationship with someone who needed a lot of support that I ‘did not feel like giving’ and that I actually ‘did not really want’. But, I did, because then I already understood what it means to start walking by principle. Understanding meaning that I understood the theory of this.

With the animals, I had to step out of an experience of feeling paralized and not being able to take action, also related to a limited amount of money to spend for physical support and from here, not knowing where to start when an animal became ill for example. I have walked many situations with these beings and it was amazing to do this. What was supporting me here, is that I did want to do it for the animals as I really and naturally ‘like’ the animals but I had to step over idea’s of ‘how much you spend and do for an animal like a rabbit or a quinea pig’. Strange idea’s, as if these little animals deserve less care than a bigger animal or a human being. But there was also a fear of ‘not having enough for myself’ in this as a point of self-interest existing within me.

Within the relationship, I learned to walk it because I could see the consequences of what would happen if I would not do the best I could and especially I learned how this would reflect back on me within myself, staying busy with doubts and questions about myself, where experiences of guilt were keeping me busy and eventually ending up within the need to ‘go back and correct myself’ and do it over again. We can also call this a ‘timeloop’. I mainly experienced this whole pattern as a ‘fear of loss’ within me and so, the ‘fear of loss’ did have been the motivation to push myself to do better and still does in many moments – to eventually and while doing so, come to a point of creation, free from this experience inside myself.

But, I did not do this because it felt natural or because I naturally wanted this. I did do this because I had learned – while walking this relationship – what it means to walk in principle and I saw I could do better. So I did not need to ‘feel’ it but could make the decision to walk it anyway, to support another (and so myself) where I can within my capacity and of course from a starting-point of common sense,  to not ‘help’ another with things that another need to learn for self but to support where another did not yet have developped an effective application and where I did not have developped this as well and so, ‘supporting another’ was/is the development in itself for myself as self-support.

This is the great thing about principled living, that in the end, the self-support is supporting another and supporting another, is supporting self.

Why am I writing this blog?

To bring forward that if and when we do understand what it means to walk by principle and when and as we have made the decision within ourself to stand by this and do and develop this every day again, that it is possible to learn for example what it means to live ‘empathy’, not because we ‘feel empathy inside ourselves’ and whatever this may mean, but from a starting-point of ‘giving as you would like to receive’ and ‘considering another’ from a starting-point of principled living within equality and oneness, where every living being deserves to be treated with support where needed and where self-honestly possible.

When I had walk through all of this (it took several years all together), I did came back to my self-will about what I want, within my life, within a relationship and with who I want to walk this, while testing what is practically possible and taking the time to see who I am willing to stand by and walk with as myself and who is willing to do the same with me. However I did have to let go of personal preferences for several years, to be able to stand up and keep standing within my utmost potential and the challenges that this gives every day.

So, empathy does not so much contain an experience or a feeling – although it can be a starting-point for those who do experience this naturally. Empathy can be practically learned and applied within a starting-point of principled living as what is best for all. These principles, they can be described, tested and cross-referenced within a self-agreement and from this agreement with and as self, it can be expanded towards an ‘agreement’ with others (family, friends, colleques, intimate relationships), as simply ‘rules’ that are considering all participants in a way that does not leave anyone behind without being heard or seen but at the same time, supporting each other to create a self-responsibility and self-dependency where needed, to be and become able to stand on our own two feet.

There is much more detail to write about this empathy. Here is a link where one can start walking this agreement within and as self, by first understanding the theory of how we actually function as a human being and also a link to a document where the basic-principles are described and commited to stand by. Without this support, I would not have been able to stabilize and grow as how I did so far and I am very much still learning and expanding in this, still with the support that is available within Desteni and that is practical and applyable in our every day live.


Proces van zelfverandering:

http://desteniiprocess.com/courses
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY(Ook in het Nederlands!)

Zelfeducatie free:
https://eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.org
De Kronieken van Jezus

Journey to Life – Reis naar Leven:
https://nl.gravatar.com/ingridschaefer1
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
Ingrid’s Desteni Witness Blog
Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
https://www.facebook.com/groups/326696524041028/

The Secret to Self-Realisation:

http://creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2013/02/day-311-secret-to-self-realisation.html

Proces van wereldverandering:
http://basisinkomenpartij.nl/

Uil forgive

Dag 633 – Migration – Is there a long-term and lasting solution?

migratie

There are many aspects of migration from human beings from one country to another that can be investigated. A situation that most takes place is that in countries where there are more opportunities to build a decent life; people will migrate to these countries from other countries where there is less to none opportunity to build a decent life for oneself and their family.

Within the countries that are more opportunities, many people react more or less to migrants coming in. Here it is already a flag-point for oneself, that if one react to people coming to the country one lives in, there is fear involved as how the reaction is showing. Why fear?

Basicely we fear for ourselves that we do not have enough money (to buy food and water, housing, health-care, education) to live from. Basicely we fear that we physically will not be able to live and if more people are coming in, there is less to divide, as a simple calculation that we have learned at school.

What we did not learn at school is to see into solutions of how to live with limited resources here on earth and how to co-operate within this from a point of what is best for all, which can be applied within the principle of ‘give as you would like to receive’. It is teached to some of us from a religious point, however there are important missing links in the religious teachings of Jesus as how it is brought into this world and so, many turn their back on the basic living principles that are mentioned within but that are not of any count on long term as what is best for all, as long as there is not a total insight in ourselves and the world-system in who we are and how we are living under the influence of the religious illusion of God/The Mind/Self-Interest in relation to Money.

So, we can state here that we have learned what the problem is (limited recources that when devided with more people, one will have less) without being educated to find and apply solutions that are best for all. So we are educated from a point of fear because a problem without solution, gives and/or confirms the experience of fear within ourselves.

Fear is not a good adviser. But we all believe that we have to live from this starting-point of fear because that is how we are educated from a very young age, from birth. And this is how we are controled within ourselves, by ourselves in/as fear and by the money-system that is build from this point of fear, to create friction and conflict that is obviously coming forward when one has to divide limited recources from a point of fear that ‘one has less when things have to be divided with more’ without being teached how to live within equality and oneness, meaning to divide all that we have from a point of co-operation in consideration and support of all live on earth.

We can discuss this very widely, however everyone knows that this is the situation that we are living in at the moment. And it is only getting worse. So we all do see the problem.

From here, when we look into this question: is it a long-term solution that is best for all living beings here on earth, to react to migration and become angry at the ones who try to move to another country because there might be some better circumstances to build a life there? Here we do neither need to discuss the answer widely because here also everyone can answer this very quickly for oneself: no it is not a long term solution that is best for all life here on earth. It is based on fear of having too little and actually based on fear of others (projected on the migrants) taking everything and ‘taking over’, as this is how we have learned what will happen from a starting-point of fear.

Here we come back to the basic-line that we are not well educated from birth of how to live practically on earth with limited recourses in a way that is best for all. We only learned how to ‘get what you can get and/or protect what one has because there is not enough and otherwise others will take it’. Where we know that the ‘others’ are also teached to get what you can get and/or protect what one has because otherwise others will take it. And this is deeply ingrained within ourselves, within and as the mind consciousness system and it is deeply ingrained in how the world-system/money-system is set up.

So yes, we can state that we do have a problem. But that does not mean that there is no solution possible that is long-term and best for all.

The solution is not to be find instantly. As we see how we are educated over years and this for generations long, one can imagine that it also takes years to change this within ourselves and within the world. And the first step in this can be to see in our own reactions of fear towards people coming to your country – ‘your country’ as the country that one is born in/living in’ as it is not ‘your ownership’ that no other has access to. It is a strange thing actually that people have to move from one country to another because it is not livible in the country that one is born/living in. It is unacceptable.

So a solution that is long-term and best for all, will be to make it livible for all inhabitants in every country and to exchange recourses with other countries to come to the best possible basic-needs to create a dignified life for all on earth. Here, again, every one can see in common sense that this is the only long-term and lasting solution that is best for all and that in the end, will stop the fear of ‘not having enough and/or having less than others/others taking over the access to the recourses’. A long term solution will be to give as we would like to receive and this applied by all/most of us.

We do all see this but most do not see how to come to a long-term and lasting solution that is best for all and so we give up before we even start to investigate and apply the very small steps that are needed to eventually, make a change in this world in how we exist. And true, there is so much hold in control within the world-system as how it is set up and from here, accepted and allowed to exist by every human being, that it seems impossible to change. In fact the control of the resources has been taken over long time ago. And from here, it seems better to ‘make the best of it’ with what one have and protect this the best possible way for oneself and ones siblings and some others nearby, under this state of control.

Here I suggest to start with stopping the fear, the resistance, the reactions in oneself and to investigate where these reactions are actually coming from. This is the ‘control’ that one can start investigating, within oneself.  From a starting-point of fear we will not be able to find solutions. There is a part of the fear that is reality-based – as we do live with limited recourses and how the world exists today, we can be sure that we will not receive our ‘equal share’ so to speak. There is also a non-realistic-part and/or a part based on future-projections and “what-if statements” where we only take ourselves in consideration in a lot of things that we actually do not directly need physically but that we do not want to ‘loose’ and share with others. And so here, we are ‘to be feared by others’ because we are not/no longer willing to live as what is best for all and give what we would like to receive ourselves. So self-honest self-introspection, self-forgiveness and self-change is definitely needed here.

If we all do what is within our ability in this, within ourselves and/or without in the system, in the positions that we are living in and within the area that we do have an influence on, this will already support with creating a ripple-effect to stand up for a world that does no longer need migration from a point of survival and where eventually, migration can become an expansion and sharing of different cultures where we will be welcomed in another country. Wouldn’t that be a great way to exist, live and share?

piepvandaag-vogels-migratie

Some ways to start investigating how the world-system without and our mind consciousness system within, are set up and actually so much more inter-related than we have ever truly realized:

Desteni I Process (individual process with practical tools to apply to step by step change ourselves into living beings who are willing and able to do what is best for all – including a FREE COURSE online in English and Dutch)

Living Income Guaranteed (possible solutions as transition fase to a world that is best for all)

(One can click on the links in the text to find interviews for self-education)

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Proces van zelfverandering:
http://desteniiprocess.com/courses
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY (Ook in het Nederlands!)

Zelfeducatie free:
https://eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.org
De Kronieken van Jezus

Journey to Life – Reis naar Leven:
https://nl.gravatar.com/ingridschaefer1
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
Ingrid’s Desteni Witness Blog
Facebook:
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
https://www.facebook.com/groups/326696524041028/

The Secret to Self-Realisation:

http://creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2013/02/day-311-secret-to-self-realisation.html

Proces van wereldverandering:
http://bigpolitiek.blogspot.nl/
http://livingincome.me/wiki/The_Living_Income_Guaranteed_Proposal
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/BasisinkomenGegarandeerdDoorEqualLifeFoundation

Uil forgive

Dag 366 – Ondersteuning en relatie – ontkoppeling

 

Ondersteuning van mantelzorgers

The Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 5

Ik zie dat ik ‘relatie’ aan ‘ondersteuning’ heb gekoppeld. Hierin is de zogenaamde partner een punt van ondersteuning, iemand waar je op kunt rekenen en dingen aan kunt vragen. En als er geen partner is, is er dus veel minder ondersteuning. Dit is wat ik los wil koppelen van elkaar. Wat zelfvergevingen.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb een partner te zien als punt van ondersteuning, en het zonder partner zijn te zien als ‘geen ondersteuning’.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb in partnerschap feitelijk ondersteuning te ‘ruilen’ voor relatie of partnerschap en er dus stiekem iets voor terug te willen, namelijk intimiteit, of een speciale plaats, of een garantie van blijven, een verblijfsgarantie lol.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb me vaak gevoeld te hebben alsof ik op de 2e plaats kom als ik geen partner heb, in communicatie met een man die wel een partner heeft.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb een eerste plaats als partner, een positie te vinden die zoveel lading heeft dat ik hier niet eenvoudig instap, welke dus feitelijk komt door de gedachten die ik er zelf aan koppel als ‘speciaal’ en ‘eerste plaats’ en ‘eerste punt va ondersteuning’ als dat dit er moet zijn, dat ik dit moet zijn, dat de ander dit moet zijn of wat als dat de ander dat juist niet is.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb te denken dat ik speciaal moet zijn om een partner te zijn.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb te denken dat de ander speciaal moet zijn om een partner te zijn.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb te denken op een partner te kunnen rekenen en hieraan dingen te kunnen vragen, gemakkelijker dan aan een ander mens.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb graag een speciale plaats voor iemand te willen innemen, en tegelijkertijd vast te komen in en als de structuur van de gedachte van een speciale plaats.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb vast te komen te zitten in en als de structuur van de gedachte van een speciale plaats welke ik zelf creeer in en als gedachte, en dus vergeef ik mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb vast te komen te zitten in mijn eigen creatie in en als gedachte.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb mezelf verdriet te doen door te denken dat partners een speciale plaats innemen bij elkaar en dat je dus zonder partner geen speciale plaats hebt, welke feitelijk gekoppeld is aan het idee van ‘geen partner – geen ondersteuning’.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb mezelf verdriet te doen door een idee van ‘geen partner – geen ondersteuning’, waarin ik in dit idee mezelf niet ondersteun maar mezelf verdriet doe.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb mezelf verdriet te doen in plaats van mezelf te ondersteunen.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb te geloven in een speciale plaats om ondersteuning te ontvangen en te geven, waarin het geven gekoppeld is aan het ontvangen, dus een geven om te ontvangen, en niet aan een ‘geven zoals je zou willen ontvangen’ welke vrij is van iedere binding in en als relatie en gebaseerd op het geven als en vanuit zelfondersteuning.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb te willen geven om te ontvangen.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb angst te ervaren, dat als ik niet geef, ik niet zal ontvangen, welke voortkomt uit een angst om tekort te komen.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb geven en ontvangen te hebben gekoppeld aan geld, en als ik weinig geld heb, te denken dat ik minder in staat ben om te geven, en als ik iets meer geld heb, angst te ervaren om te geven uit angst dat ik niet zal ontvangen en dus opeens zonder geld, dus zonder leefmiddelen, overblijf, helemaal  als er geen partner is die voor me zorgt.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb een partner te zien als iemand die voor me zorgt en me tegelijkertijd hiertegen te verzetten.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb me te verzetten tegen mijn eigen zienswijze van een partner als iemand die voor me zorgt.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb boos te worden als ik denk dat een partner mij ziet als iemand die voor hem zorgt, in en als een angst dat de partner dan achterover gaat hangen en niets meer doet, en dingen in de soep laat lopen en dan verwacht dat ik voor hem zorg, met de boodschap ‘ik zou dat ook voor jou doen’.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb ‘ik zou dat ook voor jou doen’ te zien als manipulatie, waarin ik denk dat ik iets moet doen omdat een ander ‘dat ook voor mij zou doen’, en hierin dus een ‘geven omdat er wordt ontvangen’ ontstaat, welke opnieuw niet gelijk is aan ‘geven zoals je zou willen ontvangen’.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb mezelf te manipuleren in en als de gedachte dat ik denk dat ik iets voor een ander moet doen omdat ik denk dat ‘een ander dat ook voor mij zou doen’.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb mezelf te manipuleren in en als een gedachte met weer een andere gedachte.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb boos te worden van mijn eigen gedachte dat een partner mij ziet als iemand die voor hem zorgt.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb zelf bang te zijn achterover te gaan hangen en niets meer te doen als ik een partner heb.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb niet te willen zorgen voor iemand.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb zorgen voor een ander en verzorgd worden te veroordelen en hierin in angst aanwezig te zijn en zo mezelf te voeden met angst in en als de geest, in plaats van in en als mezelf, in en als de adem, werkelijk voor mezelf te zorgen, in en als mijn fysiek.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb niet te geven zoals ik zou willen ontvangen in een angst tekort te komen in deze staat die geleid is door een ongelijke geldverdeling.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb in angst te bestaan voor tekortkoming en me dan maar te voeden in en als mijn angst in en als energie in en als de geest, waarin ik mijn fysiek langzaam opeet en dus daadwerkelijk fysiek ‘tekort’ kom.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb ergens ‘gelijke’ terugbetaling te verwachten als ik geef, wat geen gelijkheid is maar ruilhandel.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb me ‘minderwaardig’ te voelen als ik geen partner heb en ‘meerwaardig’ als ik wel een partner heb.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb partnerschap dus onbewust te koppelen aan geld, niet zozeer in directe uitgaven maar meer als vangnet voor als het misgaat.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb partnerschap te zien als vangnet voor als het misgaat, wat feitelijk een vangnet is voor het geval dat ik mezelf mis.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb een partner te zien als vangnet voor het geval dat ik mezelf mis, dus voor als ik val, en dus val ik voor een partner.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb te vallen voor een partner/voor het idee van een partner.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb te vallen voor mijn eigen ideeen en deze te projecteren op een partner zodat ik voor die partner kan vallen.

Ik vergeef mezelf dat ik mezelf toegestaan en aanvaard heb te denken te moeten geven zoals ik zou willen ontvangen, waarin  het ‘geven zoals je zou willen ontvangen’ een moraal wordt waarin in ik mezelf uit het oog verlies en het wederom doe om in een goed boekje te komen. (Het geldboekje?).

Wordt vervolgd inclusief zelfcorrecties.

The Crucifixion of Jesus – Part 5

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Mogelijkheid tot wereldverandering met gelijke kansen voor ieder-een:
www.equalmoney.org
Equal Life Foundation:
https://www.facebook.com/EqualLifeFoundation
Proces van zelfverandering:

www.desteniiprocess.com
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY
Proces van relatie naar agreement:
www.desteniiprocess.com/courses/relationships
Zelfeducatie free:
www.eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.net
www.desteni.org
Journey to Life:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
De Desteni Boodschap – Wat doen we ermee?:
https://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/02/13/dag-235-de-desteni-boodschap-wat-doen-we-ermee/
Zelfvergeving als Toegift aan jeZelf:
https://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/05/20/dag-299-zelfvergeving-als-toegift-aan-jezelf/

Dag 352 – Bernard Poolman (English)

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Sunday 11 august 2013 Bernard Poolman has passed away. His heart stopped beating.

See blogpost on Creation’s Journey to Life.

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I am not sure where to begin so I describe what I walk through since the message sunday afternoon that Bernard passed away.

When I read the message on email I first understood that his heart stopped beating and I expected that the message would go on like ‘he is in the hospital and being reanimated’ or something like that.

This is not so. Bernard really passed away.

Sadness is the first thing that comes up in me, together with disbelief and incomprehension and a thought as ‘what should we do now?!’

Soon after this it become very clear to me what to do: to move on with the activities that I am doing, and with the group who will continue doing the tasks. It was as if I was making some kind of checklist inside myself to see if I am able to continue the work what I started within Desteni, without the physical presence of Bernard being here anymore.

I am able to continue. I have called Larry and Sylvie and asked them to open the email. I wanted to share this with them. In the hourse after this, I was still pretty clear.

We have had chat at 20.00 with the whole group. Within this it became clear that Bernard will not be coming through the Portal:

Bernard will not be coming through the Portal. You must understand that Bernard was an individual standing within and as all of existence in his Physical Body; now that he is no more in his physical body, he as what he stood as, as life, as here, as all, as one, as equal still remains within existence; but he is no more an individual being/person………….. So, we cannot talk with him personally as a him personally did only exist for the time-being on earth as to what was necessary to be done. Therefore, we as individuals still here have to stand and walk this Physical Process. The dimensional process is/has been done and walked  we have to take it from here into/as the Physical and we have everything we need.

And here the real sadness came up. He is really not here anymore as ‘Bernard’, also not as an individual being in the dimensions.

The group is directly standing up within the responsibility to continue with the activities in and as Desteni untill it’s done. There are questions but there will be coming an interview from Sunette and this will probably answer most of the questions.

In the hours that follow, everything becomes clear very fast with regards to the points that I have not yet taken real responsibility for within myself; the things that I saw, but not yet ‘picked up’ to really change within myself. All these points actually leads towards the same conclusion, that I still trusted on Bernard in a way, that I am not really aware of what ‘life’  is, that I do not understand how he can deside to not continue as an individual being but as existance everywhere, being present in all life. Most of all are related to missing a point of absolute certainty. This is what I have missed so much during my life, and what I have experienced, seen and received as a support and example from Bernard. This is the point what I did not bring into standing in a sufficient way within myself because of participation within and as the mind, which gives an experience of self-doubt.

I notice that I made attachments towards Bernard with regards to his total effort with absolute certainty to bring in Life as what is best for all, untill it’s done, and that I used his absolute certainty and dedication as a motivation to push myself through. After being in South-Africa, I have asked myself several times if I would move on in self-honesty no matter what, and the answer was ‘yes’ every time. It is what I wanted to do for already 20 years, but what I was not able to take on in totality, because I was missing the complete information, the tools to bring it into practise and a living example of how to do this. I was missing the act of self-forgiveness, and without self-forgiveness, no real change is possible. Bernard and Desteni gave me the information, the practical tools and the living example, and within Desteni I picked up tasks that I am able to complete, with or without Bernard, and so I can move on with what I am doing already.

At the same time I noticed that there was still hesitation to really live in absolute certainty and dedication towards and as life. It was as if there was some kind of, “yes, but” within myself, and I was moving, but it seems like moving too slow; it felt like pushing through a fuzzy cloud of distraction.

So, the absolute certainty and effort from Bernard I used as a motivation to push myself through. And this is what I need to be for myself. During this week after his passing away, I notice a change in myself and around me, as if some veil, some ‘noise’ has moved with him. This is related to the removing of the physical systems that he was working on, and the last one that he took on while and with leaving his physical body. (There will be coming interviews about this from Sunette – you can read her blog here). As if for the first time, I see myself as being able to do this, to take full responsibility for my own mind and to work together with the group on bringing a solution into the world. I experience it as if the support as the living principles as Life as Bernard was standing in and as, is spread out everywhere in and as existence, as a platform to walk on, available for everyone who is ready to face oneself in self-honesty.

There is no choise anymore: I have to walk into living as what I see, realize and understand as the only solution and we as a group as Desteni have to walk and bring the solution into the world, and we as a group as humanity have to bring this change into living, as the only solution to live in equality and oneness in and as this physical world. We have to be, become and continue in being practical living beings as what is best for all, and within this we have to stand the test of time, as Bernard stood the test of time and has become timeless and always Here, in and as support as Life, in and as the Living Principles.

His carefullness in every breath, is what stands most by me, as Anna is also describing in her blog about Bernard.

This starts in tender care in and as myself,in the very small things. Really listening to myself. Applying self-forgiveness on the fear that comes up in this; fear for standing up in and as life in carefullness in a world that is not carefull. There is so much to do in this before I am really able to be carefull in every breath.

(Compassion in Action)  (Blog Cathy)

Life is caring, the mind is not. So the systems that exist have to be realligned with and as the living principles as what is best for all in and as carefullness, and so we need to stop the starting point of self-interest in and as the mind. This starts within ourselves, as only when we as as humanity change into carefull and trustworthy beings, we will be able to change the world into a place that is Best for All Life.

This is what Bernard and Sunette are pointing out every time again: “You only need to take full responsibility for your own Mind Consiousness System and to forgive and change yourself within this”.

This is how change will take place as 1+1+1+1+1

“Give as you would like to receive”.

Within this, real care will come in. As first there is the giving and then there is the receiving.

Bernard said several times to me: “You are still scared of people”. “What to do” I asked. “It’s a thought”, he answered.

Within my witness-blog about going to the farm I described (part of) my experience with  Bernard on the farm.

I can keep on writing while the words are not fully describing what Bernard has given and how gratefull I am for what he has done. It is to each one of us to really live as his example in and as the Living Principle.

Here are a few lines from the chat that shows how it is not about Bernard but about the Living Principle that he brought into the world, and only living by this living principles and within this, bringing life into the world until it is done, until all is life, is a real expression of gratefullness and respect towards Bernard, who is standing as Life-Self-Realised. Because, what we all are really missing is

LIFE

in and as ourselves, and so in and as the world:

we have to become the living example of the living principle in the physical (Sunette)

he’s always stood in existence, as existence – here, so he’s “here”, but not “Bernard as an individual” – what I mean with ‘he’s here in/as existence’ is the Principle, Life (Sunette)

he told us -it is never about the individual, but the principles, thus we cannot use any excuses that bernard is not alive, because the principles still stand and it is up to us to stand (Cameron)

Consider the point that Bernard wasn’t something special  but the embodiment of a principle that we can all develop ourselves as; so  then I would suggest to simply stand as that point yourself of giving yourself your life back through being disciplined, and diligent in your process of standing up (Viktor)

he will be missed – but we will not miss his message/his words/what he stood for/as – this we’ve got to take and live and continue to do so (Sunette)

I would say Bernard did a better job than Jesus. Establishing the process of walking as equals as one as the principle – so we individually and together see this through, he was the guiding point, and now we have enough guidance to guide ourselves and each other and so to those still to come to be walking with us (Sunette)

we cannot rely on one single individual as that would be again ‘following a message’ instead of living it (Marlen)

Need to look at what you saw in bernard and found missing within yourself and then give it to yourself (Fidelis)

All he ever asked of us is show others the support he has given us (Fidelis)

we each stand as a specific point within this process – Bernard stood as the living example of what we are to become, life self-realised – walking the process we have established / each has ‘their point to stand’ – so, ‘life individualized’ is like self realisation process of being/becoming life and we have the process / structure to walk to be/become it (Sunette)

 Bernard Poolman –  Living The Word Alive: DAY 231

Thank you

Video support Marlen

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(This is partly a translation of the Dutch blog that I wrote on 13 august 2013)

(Dutch blog with related self-forgiveness)

(Witness Blog)

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Mogelijkheid tot wereldverandering met gelijke kansen voor ieder-een:
www.equalmoney.org
Equal Life Foundation:
https://www.facebook.com/EqualLifeFoundation
Proces van zelfverandering:

www.desteniiprocess.com
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY
Proces van relatie naar agreement:
www.desteniiprocess.com/courses/relationships
Zelfeducatie free:
www.eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.net
www.desteni.org
Journey to Life:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
De Desteni Boodschap – Wat doen we ermee?:
https://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/02/13/dag-235-de-desteni-boodschap-wat-doen-we-ermee/
Zelfvergeving als Toegift aan jeZelf:
https://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/05/20/dag-299-zelfvergeving-als-toegift-aan-jezelf/