Dag 376 – Ignorance and preference – self-corrective statements

Dag 374 – How Every Breath Counts

Dag 375 – The gift of Life by Roos – preference and ignorance

When and as I see myself going into ignorance of someone who is asking for my attention, I stop, I breathe.

I realize that I step automatically into a pattern of ignorance, before I have even seen what it is that is asked for.

I realize that I cannot see what is asked for, if I ignore the one that is asking something and/or if I ignore what is asked.

I realize that I fear something within this moment, that I can investigate within myself, but that in this moment, I need to put my awareness to the being that is asking me something, without paying any attention to my own preference in relation towards the being that is asking for attention or to my own preference in relation to activities that I would like to do or not do.

I realize I turn my own attention around and within this, place it into self-interest related to preference within this, instead of placing my attention to the being, tp life, that is asking for it.

I commit myself to breathe, and within breath, turn myself to the being that is asking for attention, within the realization that the being may need something from me in that specific moment. I listen and see what it is that the being asks me, and if I don’t understand the question within, I just stay here and breathe, I eventual apply self-forgiveness on what is coming up inside myself. If I do understand the question within, I see within myself what it is that I can do, what is my potential, what is practical possible, what is my self-will and what is my self-interest, and what is it that I see as best for all.

When and as I see myself going into reaction about poo on the floor or other dirt that I need to clean up, I stop, I breathe.

I realize that I fear to become overwhelmed by dirt, which is actually dirt as energy as energetic reaction in and as the mind, and within this, physically paralyze as not being able to clean it up.

I realize that I have programmed reactions towards poo or dirt that I can stop and investigate inside myself.

I realize that the mind is putting up patterns as ideas as sabotage as control, and that within this, I believe that I need something to protect in and as myself, which is not so, it is just energy that wants to stay alive in and as a compromise of life in and as the physical substance, as this is the only way that energy can exist because of it’s dependency on the physical, on substance.

So I realize that I compromise life when I listen to the call for protection in and as the mind.

I commit myself to approach the dirt as poo on the floor in common sense and see how I can prevent it in common sense without compromising as controling the expression of life within this, and for rest just clean it up.

i commit myself to clean up the energetic dirt in anda smyself as existing energetic reactions, by investigating, stopping, and applying self-forgiveness and self-corrective application.

When and as I see myself, in any situation, going into preference in relation towards living beings, I stop, I breathe.

I realize that this is pre-programmed and based on energy, visible in appearance, looks, smell, noise, taste, feelings, ideas etc.

I realize that I become blind and compromise (myself as) life, when and as I follow my preference, and that this will lead to harm life within it, where life is equal, in and as the other as myself.

I realize that this is automated and so that it will take time to walk through this patterns ans stop and self-forgive the specific patterns of preference.

I realize that, with trusting on preference, I seperate myself, I ignore life, and so, in and as seperation, I isolate myself, and so create my own experience of loneliness.

I commit myself to stop and investigate preference when this is coming up inside myself, in relation towards a living being, and see within this what it is that I seperated myself from.

I commit myself to investigate the experience of loneliness further on and within this, go on listening to the Atlantean video’s about the system and experience of Loneliness, as a support.

When and as I see myself going into preference for activities to do, I stop, I breathe.

I realize that I as the mind prefer specific activities to feed the energy in and as the mind, and feed the energy by creating resistance towards activities that the mind dislike, as for example cleaning up the house.

I commit myself to make each activity as comfortable as possible, which starts with my own approach of and awareness in the activity needs to be done.

I commit myself to investigate my own reactions towards specific activities, to see what it is that gives the resistance, so that I stand up equal to my own control and self-manipulation within the resistance, which harms life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to harm myself in and as life, by controling and manipulating myself in and as a preprogrammed and a developped programmed pattern of preference towards beings and activities, and within this do harm to another life as life in general.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have compromised and harmed my physical body in and as a believe in self-manipulation and self-control, in and as preference in and as the mind, wherein the harm towards my body makes me feel so tired and exhausted that I use this as an excuse to continue with the pattern in and as the mind, in and as preference, wherein I am no longer physical able to do the labour that I do not prefer as dislike in and as the mind, and so keep myself alive in and as preference in and as the mind, and wherein I even experience myself as unable to listen and give attention to someone thats askes for my attention and eventual needs my support, or just simply wants to express as self.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to squeeze myself in and as my physical body and take my own breathe away, by living in and as the preference in and as the mind, just as how we squeeze and take the breath away of the Physical Life on Earth for the benefit of the preference in and as the mind consiousness system existing in each human being.

I commit myself to stand up in and as awareness to educate myself and humanity in how we function as a mind consciousness system in and as preference as self-interest, which is leading to the destruction of life on earth, which is something that we need to stop as soon as possible and change into support of Life in and as the physical in equality and oneness, which starts within ourselves.

I commit myself to move on with writing, investigation, self-forgiveness and self-correction, to see where and how I specificely harm my own physical body towards the state of exhaustion, related to the idea of preference in and as the mind, where in I realize that this is a way to walk during time, through unpleasant experiences of exhaustion where in I will tend to mislead myself in and as the mind, and so I need daily application of and as myself to support myself within this, where it is only in this daily application that I will be able to change, day by day, breath by breath, in and as small steps.

I commit myself to investigate within myself what is self-interest, what is preference, what is self-will and what is best for all, as as long as I do not have a clear perspective on and as myself in this, I am not able to be clear towards life in and as myself, but will start compensating the compromise I have made in myself at first hand existing in and as self-interest, and so mixing up self-will and self-interest and within this not seeing and so not acting as what is best for all life.

I realize that this is what Roos is standing for as Life, as she was always clear in and as herself as who she is and what she wants, without acting differently towards others in and as hiding something, and so she was even more clear when she became bold and walked around through the whole house, small and vulnerable, and at the same time being strong in and as herself as life. Not making compromises towards self as life.

The Gift of Life by Roos.

Full atlanteans the beginning

Atlanteans – The Beginning

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Mogelijkheid tot wereldverandering met gelijke kansen voor ieder-een:
www.equalmoney.org
Equal Life Foundation:
https://www.facebook.com/EqualLifeFoundation
Proces van zelfverandering:

www.desteniiprocess.com
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY
Proces van relatie naar agreement:
www.desteniiprocess.com/courses/relationships
Zelfeducatie free:
www.eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.net
www.desteni.org
Journey to Life:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
De Desteni Boodschap – Wat doen we ermee?:
https://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/02/13/dag-235-de-desteni-boodschap-wat-doen-we-ermee/
Zelfvergeving als Toegift aan jeZelf:
https://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/05/20/dag-299-zelfvergeving-als-toegift-aan-jezelf/

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Day 374 – How Every Breath Counts

(written sunday evening – uploaded on monday)

This week I faced a point of how every breath counts, and how a decision of ‘not being here for a moment’ can harm another life. As in this specific moment I decided to not be here for Roos the quinea pig, who was persistant asking for my attention, and I misinterpreted this, which was because I was not here but instead in the mind in and as an experience of ‘not now for a moment’ (‘nu even niet’). Last months we had build a relationship in trust, and when she came to me walking in the kitchen, I took her, or I walked with her and gave her one more piece of food, things like that. This evening it went on and on and I suddenly decided that ‘it was enough’ for a moment after all the intense care-taking for the animals and their physical condition last weeks; I became irritated by her poo that was laying in the house and was becoming a little more thin, and for the rest, actually for no specific reason. So I took her back several times, and when she did not stay in her place, I put some wood before it. Even then she was making some noise to get my attention, I registrated this but ignored this, seeing this as a way to let her become quiet (which is actually turned around, as I should become quiet in this). She suddenly jumped in the hay, and became quiet. And I became quiet as ‘satisfied’ too. I decided for one time not to check on her, as I ‘did not want to start it all over again’.

Next morning, Roos was lying on her back in the hay, very cold, not able to move. She was barely alive and I took her out and gave her a more comfortable place.  And suddenly the whole picture became clear. She wanted to get my attention because she was going to die (she was old and I knew this was coming some day). And I ignored this somehow. Slowly this dripped into my mind, how I was not here for her, how I ignored listening to her for several reasons/reactions inside myself, in and as patterns in the mind. How through this, I missed out seeing if she needed some assistance, to lay down comfortable, and I missed out her expression in that moment. Maybe I would not have understood that she was going to die, but we could have sit together for a moment and I could have seen if she needs assistance. She did exactly what she always did to get my attention, only more prominent and persistant, as this is what we build trust in, what she could trust me on, that I would listen to her, as I did all the time. However in this crucial moment, that she could perhaps not take care of herself anymore and may have needed some assistance, or just only wanted to express herself for the last time to me, I looked away; I looked in and as the mind instead of looking to Roos in and as her physical expression.

It is not acceptable to miss a moment of breathe; one cannot be trusted if one miss moments of breathe. It seems a very small point which can be questioned as ‘my interpretation’, but I notice in myself that this is a crucial point that has different patterns related in it, and it’s a confrontation with and as myself, a face to face with who I am and who I am not in every moment. I cannot yet be trusted as life, and Roos has suffered from this; and I am suffering from this, and so everyone is suffering from this.

Roos would have died anyway the same day, that is not the point. The point is a deliberate decision of not being here for a moment to listen unconditionally to who has placed/is placing trust in me and is asking for my attention.

There are, as I mentioned, patterns in it, and I will walk through this patterns one by one to become responsible for this points within myself so that I can correct myself in this and stand up in this, to become trustworthy, every day a little more.

(Note – afterwards I see that i made a decision ‘to let her for a while’ out of knowledge and information; and within this I was believing I was doing the right thing, and so approached her and the situation in and as knowledge and information, and within this, these patterns were all going to play a part, and I was not able to approach her physically and so missed an important point/moment in and as support, for myself and for Roos. I will walk this also in another blog, it may be in Dutch again).

Roos gave me a very tough lesson in this, just as her mother did when she died. Everytime an animal that I take care of, dies, I face points in myself that need correction, that are very deep down rooted in myself, and that I do not really want to see and so ignore, which leads to the ignorance of life. As shown in this event. These two quinea pigs were really prominent in this. Which could have been different when I am here, in and as breath, in every moment, in and as the physical instead of in and as the mind, constricted in patterns. Which is only possible if I totally face myself as who I am, who I have become. Because if I do not face myself in the darkest night, I will not be able to change myself, which will always lead to harm as ignorance of another life and/as life in general.

I feel like I can mourn about this over and over again, but this will not change anything, not for Roos, not for me, not for anyone and so this will not be of assistance to life. I only compromise my own body in this, as I feel I am already doing. In this event of her death, Roos gave me the opportunity to really see how every breath counts and what the consequenses are of not being here in every moment because of being constricted in the patterns of the mind. And it’s up to me to decide Who I am in this; am I giving in into emotions and regret, or am I standing up and transform it into a gift of life? Am I accepting the gift of life that she is giving me with her life and that I ignored right before she died? Am I really stopping myself in and as self-interest as reactions so that I do not feel the need anymore to stop as control the expression of life?

Thank you Roos for living with me. I really enjoyed it.

Related blogs:

Inconsideration & Consequence

Mourning as Excuse to have Pity-Party

Two Dutch blogs about Roos:

Dag 373 – Roosje is dood – feiten en ervaring

For assistance in walking the mind-patterns:

Desteni-I-Process – Lite (free course)

Desteni-I-Process-Pro

Walking in self-support with a buddy is really a support to stand up in the process of facing self in self-honesty.
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PENTAX Image
PENTAX Image
Roos (brown) en Vrouwke Bep (her mother)
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Mogelijkheid tot wereldverandering met gelijke kansen voor ieder-een:
www.equalmoney.org
Equal Life Foundation:
https://www.facebook.com/EqualLifeFoundation
Proces van zelfverandering:

www.desteniiprocess.com
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com  GRATIS ONLINE CURSUS MET BUDDY
Proces van relatie naar agreement:
www.desteniiprocess.com/courses/relationships
Zelfeducatie free:
www.eqafe.com/free
www.desteni.net
www.desteni.org
Journey to Life:
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven
7 jaar dagelijks schrijven – Dag 1 – Van ziel naar Leven
http://www.facebook.com/groups/journeytolife/
video: 2012: Nothingness – The 7 year process Birthing Self as Life
De Desteni Boodschap – Wat doen we ermee?:
https://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/02/13/dag-235-de-desteni-boodschap-wat-doen-we-ermee/
Zelfvergeving als Toegift aan jeZelf:
https://ingridschaefer1.wordpress.com/2013/05/20/dag-299-zelfvergeving-als-toegift-aan-jezelf/